Using Mom's Wedding Dress
For some brides, using their mom’s wedding dress in some way for their wedding means more to them than the actual dress they choose to wear down the aisle.
This month’s blog features two different brides who came to me with the same wish. Each wanted to bring their beloved mom, who passed away, into their life on their wedding day by using their wedding gown.
Antonietta Henry Photography
“I have had many consultations with brides who have lost their moms. Those visits to the shop are emotional, and we often share tears. But it is my brides who have heavenly angel wedding moms that I love to work with most. ”
Antonietta Henry Photography
Using Mom’s Wedding Dress
Kelly Mack
“My mom was the most caring person imaginable. She opened her arms to every one of my friends who came through the door and made sure everyone was well fed before leaving. She always wanted to hear about the current gossip like she was reliving her teenage years with us. My mother would give anything to make sure you were happy. She was a spectacular woman whom I am honored to call my mother and best friend.”
Lynda and Brad married on April 7th, 1984.
Kelly and her dad brought her mom’s wedding dress to the shop to see what ideas I could come up with to incorporate her gown into something special for her wedding day. I have had quite a few dresses come into the shop, where I created a beautiful bridal veil to cherish and pass down through the generations.
“My father and I were so devastated after my mom passed away unexpectedly. We have been so close since I was a little girl; he has always been my best friend. I knew having my dad involved in the process would make him feel close to my mom again and relive his days when he married her over 30 years ago.”
“I loved the tiered lace on her mom’s gown and asked Kelly if the designer was Alfred Angelo. She had no idea. We opened the dress, and there it was, “Alfred Angelo, Inc. Made in U.S.A.” How could I forget the style of designer Alfred Angelo? He was the inspiration for my own wedding gown design in 1982.”
“Marie was amazing! The second I brought the dress in, she knew exactly who the designer was. Marie had so many ideas and was the biggest help. I couldn’t have been happier.”
I removed only one layer of lace to keep the dress intact and preserve its essence. I tell my brides that the deconstruction and preparation of vintage elements take as much time as creating the new design from scratch. Each tiny stitch had to be carefully removed not to damage the lace. The next step was thoroughly cleaning, drying, and pressing the vintage lace to prep it for the design stage.
Kelly brought her Maggie Sottero gown in for me to see. I suggested we make a custom pattern to follow the shape of her hem. Creating a subtle V at the center back would allow the veil to follow the perimeter of her gown beautifully down the aisle.
“I was so pleased with the entire process. Marie would send me pictures to update me and was thorough. What I loved most about the veil was how the shape perfectly matched my train.”
Using the lace from her mom’s vintage wedding dress, I created a unique bridal veil that made Kelly happy and feel her mom's presence.
Kelly had no idea, but her dad came to see me on a separate occasion to consult about making a custom handkerchief as a gift from him. He wanted to embroider something on it to provide a keepsake with shared memories. I suggested we use the small piece of lace on the bodice. I asked Brad if he could recall anything special that only Kelly and her mom shared, and he sent me a photo of a tattoo they both got on their foot.
“My father was so secretive about this. He gave me the handkerchief the night before my wedding, and it brought me chills. Before my mother died, we got tattoos together. Our phrase was “Always, Always” from the movie Step Mom. It was amazing how thoughtful it was, and it shows how much he cares about his wife and daughter.”
Wedding Photography by Marquee Studio
GOWN / Maggie Sottero VENUE / Perona Farms WEDDING VEIL & HANDKERCHIEF / Headpiece.com BEAUTY / D’amelio Cosmetics FLOWERS / The Hidden Daisy EMBROIDERY / Initial Encounter
“The whole morning, when I was getting ready, I was so excited for my wedding day, but it was bittersweet knowing my mother wasn’t present. The second I put the veil on, it felt like she was truly with me. It brought me so much comfort. I did everything I possibly could to honor her life.”
“My father is a very emotional person. The second he saw the veil, he started crying. He was so nervous he was going to step on it!”
“I gave myself 10 minutes to cry that morning. That was it. I knew my mother would be so upset with me if I were crying all day about it. Minutes before my ceremony, it started to downpour. The second I walked down the aisle, the sun was shining down. My aunt believes the little rainstorm was my mom’s tears of joy. This comforted me, knowing she was telling me she was watching every moment. Life isn’t always the way you planned. I’m thankful because I had an amazing mother, and not everyone gets that chance.”
Using Mom’s Wedding Gown
Amy Rose Montaruli
“My mother was the heart of our family and the epitome of someone we should all aspire to be. Her greatest lesson to us was the importance of love and family. That love permeated into every facet of her life. This was strengthened by the unconditional love of my father, a love that began when they were in eighth grade.”
Denise and Tony married on August 4th, 1979
“After overcoming Breast Cancer a few years earlier, my mom was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia, which turned into a three-year battle. She made it clear to every doctor that she had one goal. She was fighting to see her children get married and have families of their own. My mom’s fight was never for her but for us.”
“Having Corey as part of this restoration journey with me was so important. Corey didn’t have the opportunity to meet my mom, but he knew how much I missed her and, most of all, how hard it was to plan my wedding without her.”
I loved this wedding gown, and as my designer brain functions, I thought of how it could be restyled into a beautiful current gown. However, I was tasked with designing a veil for Amy Rose using her mom’s original cathedral bridal veil and elements of her wedding dress.
“Her mom’s gown was in beautiful condition. I immediately recognized that this gown was handmade. I asked Amy Rose about its history. Sadly, there were no family members alive to recount the design of this beautiful wedding dress.”
While I loved the classic beauty of her mom’s 1979 wedding gown, I had very little lace to work with to design a custom veil for her. I had to make the best of every inch of lace. After removing the lace, it was cleaned and cut apart in preparation for repurposing. It took great skill to fashion the minimal lace frills into a beautiful wedding veil for Amy Rose.
“Marie was always looking for ways to enhance the design, whether redesigning the shape for a more modern look, adding crystals, or creating beautiful beaded lace at the comb. When I first consulted with Marie, I had not started dress shopping. I was going to pick my wedding dress around the veil creation. For me, the veil would be the prized possession of my wedding day look.”
“We felt inspired by Marie’s vision of turning Amy’s mother’s wedding dress into a meaningful and elegant piece that Amy would wear confidently on our wedding day. She listened to Amy talk about the story of her late mother, Denise, to understand their special bond and what we were looking for.”
Wedding Photography by Hitched Productions
GOWN / Jude Jowlison VENUE / Pomme Radnor WEDDING VEIL / Headpiece.com HAIR / Top Knots by Aimee MUA / Glam with Amber Helverson FLORIST / Layers of Lovely Design
“I remember looking in the mirror after my dress and veil were on. I was always afraid of this moment, knowing how much I yearned for my mother to be witnessing it. But what I saw was not a motherless bride but a bride completely embraced in a piece of her.”
“My dad and I did a first look together. When he turned around, there was a profound gasp; he was speechless! He could not believe it was the same veil my mother wore. He told me how beautiful I looked and that my mom would have absolutely loved this. I could only imagine what this moment was for him, walking his little girl down the aisle wearing the veil my mother, the love of his life, wore over 40 years ago.”
“People were in awe of the redesign and felt her presence when I walked down the aisle. Many wondered where I found a talented designer to not only restore but redesign a veil of this magnitude, knowing all the intricate work and endless hours that had to go into it. That’s Marie!”
“I can’t speak for other brides who are creating a piece from someone beloved who has passed away, but for me personally, it was very therapeutic and healing, the whole process from beginning to end.”
“My advice to other brides who have lost their mom is simple: find a way to incorporate her in your own special way. Take her with you and let her be beside you. And in her own little way, she will let you know she is with you on your wedding day. The rain stopped 10 minutes before I walked down the aisle—That was her!”
This was a difficult blog for me in many ways. I have designed for many brides who have lost someone dear to them before their wedding. I lost my mom unexpectedly in July of 2021. We were supposed to be leaving to spend time in Martha’s Vineyard together just days before she passed away. I always say it doesn’t matter her age or time you are in your life. Losing your mom is a profound loss. What I have learned through my brides is the added heartache of not having them there on their wedding day. I will always design with all my being and use all the gifts God gave me for my special brides. <3 Marie
See you next month on the Fourteenth