Honoring Mom Using Her Wedding Gown
Finding ways to incorporate your mom, who has passed away, into your wedding day is private, personal, and emotional. Madeline brought me her mother’s 1988 bridal gown, looking for a unique way to honor her mom.
Making Mom’s Wedding Gown Into A Bridal Veil
My bride did not want a traditional and apparent memorial display like a memory table. She wanted to feel her mother’s presence intimately throughout her wedding day.
“My mom passed away suddenly and tragically 364 days before my wedding. My mom was my best friend, and I was looking for a special way to honor her. I was worried that if I did something very obvious and public-facing, it would be too much for me emotionally. I didn’t know that it was even an option to use my mom’s wedding dress in some way until I found Marie.”
“While my mom was sick in the ICU, Lauren, one of the nurses who was caring for her, overheard me saying, “I can’t get married without my mom.” Lauren shared with me that her own mom had passed when she was in high school and she honored her mom on her wedding day by wearing her mom’s restyled wedding veil, which was created by Marie. This chance encounter feels even more like a special connection because my mom and I are both nurses and work at this same hospital.”
A Beautiful Way to Feel Your Mom’s Presence on Your Wedding Day
So many brides who come to me looking to restore or restyle their mother’s bridal headpiece or wedding veil have lost their mom. I know their consultation will be filled with mixed emotions. I listen to them and tell them about the loss of my mom just three years ago. I know how hard it is to lose your mom, but I will never know how hard it is to not have her there on your wedding day. I wrote about my mom in my August 14th, 2021 blog post, “The Bride I Loved the Most.”. It was her birthday and just one month after her passing.
“Losing my mom and being a mom helps guide me through these emotion-filled consultations with my brides. My goal is always to provide peace, comfort, beauty, and memories through vintage wedding fashions their moms originally wore.”
I have worked with so many brides over the years. When Madeline told me the heartfelt story about her mom in the ICU and the compassionate nurse who offered comforting words, I had to think back to which Lauren it was. The next challenge was locating her contact information. I hoped it was still the same as it was in 2022 when she got married.
“I was looking for a way to commemorate my mom on my wedding day and reuse something of hers. My cousin found headpiece.com on Instagram, and I knew Marie could bring my vision of revamping my mom’s 1980s wedding veil into my own veil to life.”
I have many ideas for restyling a mother’s wedding attire into something beautiful and meaningful for your wedding day. For Lauren, I cleaned the pearls and crystals from her mom’s headpiece and used them to design beautiful hairpins for her bridal accessories. After I restyled her mom’s wedding veil into a simple style, it resembled nothing 80s-like.
Photos By Pearl Paper Studio
Lauren is wearing her mom's beautiful, restyled vintage wedding veil and hairpins.
“I definitely felt a special connection with Madeline after sharing my story with her and trying to make her feel like she wasn’t alone. I was happy to be able to help her remember her mom in a special way on her wedding day because I know what it is like not to have a loved one with you on one of the biggest days of your life.”
Lauren and her husband on her wedding day at Bear Brook Valley in Fredon, NJ.
Design Consultation With Marie
“I never opened my mom’s preservation box until I arrived at the shop. When I started this process, I was not sure if we had her wedding gown or if anyone knew where it was. I am a little embarrassed to admit that even in looking at photos from my parent’s wedding, I never really noticed the details of my mom’s dress, just that it was big, pouffy, and a typical 80s dress.”
When we opened the box, Madeline immediately fell in love with the lace, which was elaborately beaded with sequin flowers and pearls, and the oversized bow at the back waist.
“My mom and I loved shopping together. She was my go-to girl for a very honest opinion on any outfit or style decision. Shopping for my bridal shower dress without my mom felt like yet another loss—one more wedding-related thing I had to do without her.”
When I put the gown on my mannequin, Madeline reacted to seeing the large bow on the back of her dress.
“Seeing this commonality between my mom’s dress and the dress I chose for my shower felt like a little ‘wink’ from my mom. This was totally unexpected and a very special and comforting moment for me. I felt like I could hear my mom telling me, “Great dress, Mad! That seal of approval from my style guru meant the world to me.”
The work of deconstructing a vintage wedding gown and restyling it into something completely new is often underestimated. Such an endeavor involves many challenges and requires expertise to be done correctly.
“The lace must be carefully removed stitch by stitch, a tedious process that can take hours. Next, it needs to be cut and sculpted around the perimeter of the custom veil and basted in place. With Madeline’s veil, the lace had to be sewn entirely by hand because of the original placement of the beading. Repairing missing beading was also necessary.”
“Madeline hoped to keep the essence of the original lace work on her mother’s wedding gown train. Accurate measuring was required to achieve a similar layout. The entire process, from gown deconstruction to finished wedding veil design, took over thirty hours.”
“It was amazing to see the finished project and how we made this beautiful, timeless veil out of a pouffy 80s wedding dress.”
The Finished Custom Wedding Veil
Wedding Photography by Milton Gil Photographers
VENUE / The Park Savoy WEDDING VEIL / Headpiece.com BEAUTY / Primp Hair Studio FLORIST / Pink Dahlia Floral Design BRIDAL GOWN / Élysée
“I learned to appreciate how big of an impact a wedding veil can have on your overall wedding day look. I loved my dress, but my veil was the real showstopper. I didn’t want to take it off.”
“My Aunt Carrie (my mom’s sister) was with me in the bridal suite. I showed her my veil and pointed out the design elements that we used from my mom’s dress. It was emotional for both of us, but especially for Aunt Carrie, knowing that she was with my mom when she got ready for her wedding wearing that dress, and now with me wearing it repurposed 36 years later.”
“Seeing my finished veil was so special. It was so beautiful, and wearing it made me feel like my mom was literally wrapped around me. My veil was a total stunner, and my mom would have LOVED it!”
“I went into this project thinking it was priceless. I was willing to spend whatever it took to create this beautiful keepsake, and it was worth every penny. My veil is so special, and I pray that I have a daughter who also wears it someday.”
“I am so glad that Lauren was taking care of my mom and told me about Marie and her work. Knowing that I had a way to honor my mom, that was so special and so beautiful, helped me process this tremendous loss and especially helped me navigate the grief surrounding not having my mom physically present at my wedding. It was such a blessing being able to work with Marie, and it was truly healing for me to have such a special way to honor my mom at my wedding.”
See you next month on the Fourteenth